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EP 18 Setting Boundaries

Uncategorized May 11, 2021

Episode 18 is all about setting boundaries. Boundaries with business, yourself, your loved ones, and your clients! We all know that when you get started with a client you want to do so much for them and it can be really hard to say no! So i'm going to walk you through all the steps you need to really own what you want and what's right for you because The Soul Rhythm Podcast is all about being authentic and part of being authentic is knowing your truth!

 

When we set boundaries we…

  • We are less stressed and have more mental bandwidth 
  • Establish relationships that are emotionally healthy on both sides 
  • We set an example for others to do the same 

How to set healthy boundaries

  • REMEMBER: You are doing enough, you don’t need to do more, nor do you need to be the savior. YOU ARE ENOUGH 
  • Prioritize yourself  and maintain awareness of your own priorities, needs and desires 
  • Be okay with saying NO (A yes, means a no for somEpisode 18 is all about setting boundaries. Boundaries with business, yourself, your loved ones, and your clients! We all know that when you get started with a client you want to do so much for them and it can be really hard to say no! So i'm going to walk you through all the steps you need to really own what you want and what's right for you because The Soul Rhythm Podcast is all about being authentic and part of being authentic is knowing your truth!ething else) 
  • Set the expectations from the start (when we create structure, people are not surprised and know what to expect) 
  • Be assertive and own your decision (no regrets or guilt) 
  • Be okay with people being “disappointed” at first. They are not used to you setting those boundaries so at first there may be an element of surprise. 
    • Assess the relationship
  • Rinse & Repeat 



Soul Activation/ Homework:

  • Take inventory of your current boundaries (go through you day and notice where you wish you would set better boundaries 
  • Take time to journal on your inventory
    • How would I feel if these new boundaries were set? 
    • If I could have it my way, how would my boundaries look like?
    • Ask yourself: 
  • Guess what? You CAN and should have it your way!! So begin implementing the steps to set boundaries

Full Episode: Setting Boundaries

Let’s set boundaries! Episode 18 is all about setting boundaries with your business, yourself, loved ones, and with clients! I know when we first start with a client you want to do absolutely everything you can for them and that can make saying no so hard! So I’m going to be walking you through all the steps you need to go through to really own what you want and what is right for you! As you know, The Soul Rhythm Podcast is all about being authentically you, and honestly part of being authentic is really owning your truth and knowing that you don't have to do more and save people. By that I mean that when we don't have healthy boundaries, we feel like we have to help and save everyone before we actually help and take care of ourselves. So we are going to walk through why it is so important to fill your own cup first. You're here on Earth for a purpose and if you don't set boundaries and own your worth and what you want to do then you are going to be consistently stressed, and you're going to have mental breakdowns. Yes, it's good to help people, especially our loved ones, but when it's at the expense of our own energy and mental health then it ends up not being a long term option because we aren't able to show up and help from a space of expansion. So Setting up boundaries really helps us increase our mental bandwidth because we aren't being bombarded. It also helps allow you to establish relationships that are healthy on both sides because when you set boundaries you actually empower others to do so as well. 



Let’s talk about boundaries within your business. When you've set healthy boundaries, you aren't working 24/7. You're not on that hamster wheel grinding, and depleting your energy and eventually burning out. I remember when I first started my business 5 years ago, I was working full time, and that meant that I had to work every night and weekend. I managed to “balance” It but that meant sacrificing sleep and calmness. I was always stressed because I would work 9-5 then work every night and on the weekends. There came a time where I thought “Oh my gosh if I keep working this way I'm going to burnout, this is not sustainable” This is where self awareness and intention are so important. Having self awareness and knowing that we are wanting something and that we are willing to do it while doing it with an intention that is honestly the key piece to doing anything. Be aware of how you are choosing to create your day. I made the decision to set a work schedule for myself. I started block scheduling my day! Whereas the unhealthy boundary there would have been to stay plugged into my work from the moment i wake up to when i go to bed. Once you do own the boundaries you set yourself for your business, then you do the thing you need to do and you actually get to unplug and set yourself free and feel really accomplished. Not only will you have a sense of freedom but you build confidence and you'll feel really accomplished. 

 

Now setting boundaries with your clients… This is a big one! I think it's human nature to want to push the boundaries. Now on the receiver end we need to know that it's okay for our clients to be setting boundaries. But when we allow our clients to break our boundaries then we aren't setting a good example, so it's so important to set expectations from the start and follow through with them. That way you're creating a predictable situation. We are going to go step by step through how to own these decisions and set these expectations. When you're working with clients you want them to know that you're there to support them however they need but they are not to depend on you because as a business owner themselves it's their responsibility to live their life in their own way and be at the driver's seat. And when we set the expectations we are allowing them to do just that! Instead when we have no boundaries it can become a crutch for them. 

 

Now with your loved ones, this can be a bit more difficult because these people already know you, and they know you to be a certain way and so when you start to set these boundaries, you may be told that you're not there for them, you're changing, or even possibly that you don't care. And I mention this because you probably will hear some form of this because they have an expectation of you. But by setting those boundaries, you're actually helping yourself and in the long run helping them as well, because now they are able to do these things for themselves. They need to get used to this new level you. And if they don't understand and they eventually don't end up feeling empowered by your boundaries then reevaluate that relationship and if it's still serving you in a positive way.  And if they don't shift and become empowered then it's not your responsibility. It's not your job to change others. 

 

So how do we set healthy boundaries? I’m going to walk you through a really easy step by step process I use with myself and with my clients. Boundaries are another key element to really being successful in your business and in life in general, because it's when you fill your cup first that you can help fill so many others and have the capacity to help others in this world. It's not through allowing people to come in and you being the savior. Because guess what, you are doing enough. You don't need to be doing more inorder to feel validated. You are enough. Step one is to really remember that you are doing enough and you're not the savior. Then you want to prioritize yourself, Maintain awareness of your own needs and desires. So I love starting every day of the week with my agenda, I look at my calendar and get really clear on what my day/ week looks like. And I set my 3 priorities for each and every day then I choose how I want to feel and say what am I going to do and think to feel this way.  Then own those decisions and be okay with saying no and setting expectations from the start. Then the last step is literally just to  rinse and repeat. Just be okay with knowing that you are going to have to keep setting these healthy boundaries throughout life so you can reach your potential. 

XX,

Carla Marconi @carla11marconi

Holistic Business Coach || Mindset & NLP Expert

Breathwork & Yoga Facilitator || Hypnotherapist

 

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