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EP 15 - The power of Surrendering

Uncategorized Apr 23, 2021

In this weeks episode of The Soul Rhythm Podcast I share about my experience in planning a wedding short notice and how I surrendered to what was out of my control. It's so important to surrender control and release our expectations. If I hadn't my wedding could have been ruined by the storm that rolled in, but instead it was the most magical day of my life to date. 

 

 

Talking Points and Takeaways:

  • All about my experience in letting go of control and surrendering while planning my wedding.
  • Releasing expectation.
  • The importance of surrendering.
  • Knowing that your efforts are fully supported.

Soul Activation/ Homework:

  • Release your expectations and fully surrender.

Full Episode: The Power of Surrendering

It's when I finally decided to surrender that things truly started to happen for me instead of to me and things just started to flow more. It's when we are gripping onto the things that we want that's called attachment, you're so attached to results that it feels like the universe is out to get you and it almost feels like you're swimming upstream. And so I'm going to tell you all about our wedding week.

 

We were originally going to get married in Cancun, Mexico April 3, 2021 and then Covid happened and even back when we began planning the wedding covid had started to become a thing, but I think like many, we assumed that it would all be over by the time the next year came around. We never thought that covid would last this long, so we planned on keeping it and were pretty keen on keeping our plans. And the best part of this destination wedding was that we didn't want this one and done event, we wanted a full weekend with everyone we loved. We wanted to connect and help our families connect, because part of a marriage, in my opinion, is you have an opportunity to facilitate connections between these two families. And for us it was very important to allow our friends and families a space to connect and play and have fun so they could come closer because we are now one unit. So we had planned this beautiful weekend, friday to Sunday with a couple days extra if people chose. We actually went to the resort and tried the food and had basically planned our whole wedding, and fast forward to end of February, we started second guessing whether our wedding was going to happen in Cancun or not. A Lot of people started reaching out worried because they had already bought flights and booked their stay, everything was ready to go, but the truth is people had a lot of fear of traveling and being amongst a large group of people. And so we had to decide if we wanted to elope and go to court to get married, postpone for another year, or keep it local. And I remember having a conversation with my now husband about it and he wanted to postpone. I remember with my whole being just not wanting that having so much uncertainty. 

 

Yes, we are talking about surrendering and i could have surrendered and said hey yes let's wait and keep our plan of doing it in Cancun. But something inside me just didn't feel good about it, and we do have some control and I didn't want us to be so attached to this idea that we have already created. It wasn't worth putting people at risk, stressing people out, and not having everyone I loved be there. So we decided to completely redo our wedding local on a very short notice. We still wanted some of the same elements from the Cancun wedding so we had it outside by the water, we still had 3 events Friday through Sunday and we really wanted to create a safe space for people to come to so we had people covid test before they came, Masks were encouraged if they made you feel safer, and we were all going to be outdoors spread out. Here we were planning wedding 2 in a matter of 2 weeks, I had already released the expectation of our Mexico wedding and I had this new dream. I had built this new idea of a wedding and it was better than i could have imagined.

 

So wedding week arrives, and there's obviously the element of the weather. So my wedding planner and I had discussed the use of a tent because a storm was actually blowing that weekend and we were watching it the whole time and it started looking like the rain wasn't starting until Sunday so we opted out of the tent. Then I remember showing up the day of the wedding and I went to the room we were all supposed to be getting ready in and there were these huge windows. I looked outside and it was like the perfect day, the sky was blue and it was beautiful. I was in this mindset that it doesn't matter what happens today because what matters is that I'm marrying my best friend and my lover and partner in crime and we were just concerned with having the most amazing time and experience with the people we love. And that was the most important thing, but i wasn't really aware of that until after and i'll tell you why. The morning went great and I was hanging with the most amazing girls, but as the day progressed the clouds started getting darker. Then come around to doing our first look it was like a hurricane was rolling in. So the wedding planner was talking about possibly bringing the wedding inside and I was completely okay with that if we needed to and because again it was the reality of it doesn't matter how we do it, but that we do it and make the best out of it. And that was part of surrendering and just releasing the attachment to the shape and time and how things are going to happen because I could have gripped onto this idea of exactly how I wanted my wedding to go  and ended up really sad over this idea of how my wedding would go. When at the end of the day that's not what’s important.  I chose not to be attached to this idea because what's important was the union and coming together of these two people and families. 

 

I truly decided to surrender and when the time came to needing to move the wedding inside “I told my planner I loved her idea on how we could improvise the wedding and sent her to do her thing, because i knew we were going to make the absolute most out of this wedding no matter what and that the important thing was that we would be married. So we did end up moving it in and it ended up probably being even better than it ever would have been before, we had a very intimate ceremony and the venue was beautiful. It was an unforgettable weekend and was  truly the most magical day of my life to date. 

 

If I would have gripped onto these ideas, first being married in Mexico then outside I would have been so stressed out and my memories of my wedding day would have only been of stress and feeling defeated by things that were truly out of my control. And this can be applied to everything in life because life always throws you curveballs. The beauty of living life and going on your journey is knowing how to embrace them. Part of the reason it was the most incredible weekend is because everyone rallied and made the most of it. And that's really in the act of surrendering, trusting, and releasing expectations. A big game changer for me is tapping into the feelings that I want to feel in a certain situation and with my wedding I was very clear that I wanted to feel joyful, loved, expansive and connected because part of my goal for the weekend was to be as present as possible. Those feelings are what I held onto, I'm marrying my best friend, the man of my dreams and we are here together making this an incredible experience and come rain or shine that's what happened. And this goes for everything because life always has a better situation waiting around the corner. If you stay stuck gripped onto the situation you were expecting then you miss the train because again if I’d dwelled on how shitty things could have been then I would have missed the opportunity to connect with everyone and be present on my wedding day.

XX,
Carla Marconi @carla11marconi
Holistic Business Coach || Mindset & NLP Expert
Breathwork & Yoga Facilitator || Hypnotherapist 

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